each day is new

I can remember clearly the striving..... the oppression, I can remember clearly the addiction, the weekends filled with alcohol, drugs, sitting around a fire..... Was it depression? Was it addiction? Or is it this recent genetic defect that I have recently learned about with in our genetic make up?  What is this generational curse that embodies us? Now, looking back I think my dad, my mom too and most of my siblings all were self medicating with whatever they could find to dull the hurt of the world all around them. Though they are my memories,  now,  I look back and feel like whatever they are-  they are mine. Memories of my dad, my family,  those however painful at times were also fun times too. I could have easily stepped around the corner, smoked weed, drank alcohol or any of it, but I didn't want to repeat the curse, I wanted to be different. I wanted more out of life. We did not ask for this room or this music, we were invited in.  Th...

Recently I was reading some struggles from a Foster Mom.  I cannot imagine taking care of a sick child day in and day out, but I have taken care and help raise children that were not biologically mine and also have raised children that are biologically mine. I must say that both are equally hard because being responsible for another human being is heavy. It's hard, it's real and great yet hard and heavy.  Being a parent is rewarding on all fronts but also a very serious responsibility. I have made mistakes. I have said things, done things, and messed up at parenting on many levels, but as I get older I remind myself that I am only human and to be human is to Err....if you are trying, if you are living - well you are most likely apt to make a mistake. A mother's love, and a mother's heart is always such a special thing. When I say mother, you know who I am talking to;  whether you have biologically birthed a child or you are a foster mom, a mom of an adopted child, ...

Are there times when you just want your dad, or your mom, or anyone to comfort you in your present circumstance. Maybe you just want to ask a question but it's impossible. It's been so many years since I lost my dad. I was in my twenties and felt like such an orphan when he passed.  I had always been so independent -so, not for that reason, but for the reason that my family circle was broken. My family was broken and those memories of him drinking and being rowdy now became the only memories. The piggy back rides, the joking, the fun...... a memory. One memory though that stands out ... even though we were not extremely close,  is the memory of his heart. He had a heart of gold. Countless times as a truck driver he would pick up strays,  not animals...people,  and some would end up at our house. He was a champion for the weak. Now as a young man and even teen he might have been a bit of a bully. He played football and played hard. He was pretty popular at schoo...

In a world full of competition and getting ahead, how do we retain and appreciate morals? Are morals slipping away? Often kids are taught morals in church but studies show more and more people are skipping church or if they are going they find that mega church that will allow them to just go to worship service get a feel good feeling and never connect. What about the children, well even if they are being dropped off in a program, they are getting the same - little connection, little engagement.  Are we teaching them morals at home? There was once a time in this great America that even if the parents did not darken a door of a religious building,  the mom or dad or both would still teach the children a great deal about morals and virtues. Are we doing that now ? As a teacher in adult learning, I am seeing less and less of the virtue of integrity.  We see more and more lapse in decision making and loss of academic integrity than what we would like. Why is this? Is i...

     In today's schools, more and more kids are suffering from anxiety and depression. It's not always due to the parents or being pushed by the parents, but the busy world we live in thrives on such a competitive environment. Students feel that they must achieve at the top of their class in order to be successful. College tuition is at it's highest and student loans are as well. The generation we live in pushes to be debt free but the debt keeps building up. We are living in a false economy and our children are paying for it. Our lives are paying for it. Our family time, our down time is non-existent because we must work hard, achieve, dream big and our children are trying their best to follow in our footsteps but due to privilege they struggle because they don't understand or have the same drive, they just know that the competition is there and the struggle is real.   Gone are the days of being successful with a high school diploma, now the bachelor's degree is t...

Can one act of kindness change the world? Could something you do for one person, if we all committed to doing one act, would we change the world? Could we? I can remember the obsession America and the world had with Princess Diana. It wasn't just because she was royalty. It was because she was the 'people's princess'. She was kind, she helped others, but most of all she was the 'people's princess' because she cared about people. She never made anyone feel small with her presence,  she made people feel hopeful in mankind because of her presence and the love and kindness that she bestowed through her being.  Perhaps you can think of someone like that, someone in your life who helped you up, who lifted you, a kind word, a smile or act.   Do we all just get too busy, and too self absorbed to see our fellow man that struggles?  Words, smiles, and most gestures are free, it will not cost you a dime to encourage someone. Try it. I have a friend that...

Sometimes He Calms His Child  I rushed around this morning trying to think of what means most to me, what books, what pictures, what items I might want to put in ziplock bags, take with me, ( in case of complete loss) or put up  high in case there is just a little flooding. My mind was in overload at this point. I had spent all day yesterday helping to board up the house and seal the doorways and I felt physically tired already even though I had slept all night.  We originally were gonna stay at home, but as Irma kept changing,  at the last minute, we decided the storm surge risk was nothing to play with or gamble with shall I say.  Irma cannot decide which way she is gonna blow and I feel like she is just a huge stick of dynamite.  Though this city has never in all of history had a storm come this severe or large, no one really could tell us what to expect as far as storm surge, so we decided to leave our home. It was harder than I thought...